Madonna Is Still Better Than You

16 Février 2015, 18:29pm

Publié par MadonnaArtVision published a very funny and bitchy article about Madonna‘s haters. Check out...

I may have more gay male friends than the average person. This is good thing. I’m constantly up on the trends, invited to all the fun events, and usually not subjected to a plethora of ugly baby photos and game requests when perusing Facebook or the like.

Yet there is something happening with a few of my fellow homos I’m not so happy with. It’s something I take personally, even though I probably shouldn’t. I can’t help it.

Nowadays, it would appear more fashionable than ever to put Madonna down.

Voicing annoyance with Madonna isn’t a new thing. In fact, it’s been happening for over 30 years. People have been speaking poorly of Madonna since before I was born. This is a woman who has arguably capitalized more on smack-talking and shit-throwing than any other entertainer in history.

What’s grinding my gears as of late is the abundance of nothing-special, average-at-best, no-named individuals who think they’re somehow a relevant beacon in pop culture or the newest critic to join the artistic elite.

Late last year, several tracks from Madonna’s upcoming album Rebel Heart were leaked on the Internet. These songs were unfinished, stolen demos spread throughout the world prior to being completed and without the artist’s consent. A calm, rational person would understand the quality of these leaked tracks would not be superb, as they were never intended to be heard by the public.

Like a moth to a flame (pun intended), the fabulous queens of the internet began rolling out their judgements like dollar store red carpets. From all the nastiness I read, I couldn’t help but come to this conclusion: these folks feel better about themselves by trashing Madonna. After all, by proclaiming they’re not exactly Living For Love, they can appear holier-than-thou in musical taste.

What’s cooler than being too cool for cool?

Just you watch and see. These same fanny-bandits will be nodding their heads to the beat of Unapologetic Bitch in no time.

Rather than continue on this recent history lesson, I would rather ask this not-so-new wave of Madonna haters a few questions.

When was the last time someone bought your album?

It’s easy to speak ill of artists. After all, art is subjective. But trashing someone like Madonna is best left to those who have completed even a fraction of what she has. If you’re such an expert when it comes to the skill of creating memorable Top 40 hits and accompanying those tracks with meaningful and inspirational auditory accessories, why haven’t I seen your CD at Target or found your album on iTunes?

Oh, that’s right. Because you haven’t done it. You probably haven’t created anything that memorable. You may “love music” or may be a “DJ” or may listen to Pandora “all the time.” That doesn’t put you in a place to feel like you’re better than Madonna. You’re not.

Are you one of the most famous people on the planet?

I will admit, being famous or popular isn’t necessarily a parallel to quality. McDonald’s is very popular, yet can barely be classified as food. Let’s make one thing clear: Madonna is no dollar menu item.

So while your ego may be swollen from the 28 likes and 16 comments you received on that scathing Madonna post; outside of your Facebook friends and Twitter followers, very few people know who you are. And even fewer care.

Everyone knows who Madonna is, and everyone knows Madonna’s biggest hits.

Your biggest hit is a selfie on Instagram.

Are you in better form than the people following you?

Who am I kidding? Unlike Madonna, no one is actually following you.

After being regarded as a pioneer in what she has accomplished, Madonna is still out-performing, out-selling, and out-inspiring her younger counterparts. Forget Britney, Miley, and Katy. The Queen of Pop still wears her crown. And she looks damn good doing so.

The closest thing you have to imitators is the guy you saw last weekend wearing the same shirt you bought months ago. God, he’s so the Gaga to your Madonna.

Not even close.

Are you still reading this article?

You’ve now read nearly 700 words in a piece about how Madonna is better than you. And you are still reading. Would you like to know why there isn’t a single mention of how you’re better than Madonna anywhere on the planet?

Because you’re not.